How are you all? It has certainly been awhile. I would like to find a way to get blogging back into the regular circuit, but I have been terrible about fitting it in this year. Big year in many ways.
Moving along… I got some advice recently from my awesome Nutrimetics Business Coach. And the more I think about it, the more I apply it and love it to the rest of my life. Ready.
No is better than maybe.
That simple. Get Maybe out of your life!
For your own sake, wasting any time on giving a Maybe, which should be a No is a waste of your time, energy and thoughts. Say no and move on.
Recently, I had a wedding that I really wanted to attend but I was waiting on some funds to come into make a decision about whether or not we could go. I was sitting on maybe. If they came in early it would be Yes if they didn’t it would be No. Then I realised the Bride really needed and wanted to know one way or another. (She was politely giving me extra time.)
After thinking about the above advice, I decided to waste no further time (my own or the Bride’s) and make a bloody decision! I thought about both options, risking a Yes and hoping the funds would come through OR saying No and taking the pressure off. And in the end I said No because I realised that was probably how it was going to pan out. I was wasting time and energy stressing, evaluating and planning when I just needed to let it go. And actually it felt quite good to tick it off my list of things to think about.
For the recipient’s sake Maybe is just incredibly annoying. You can’t make actual plans around Maybe and neither can the recipient.
So why do we do this? I think that on some levels we think that Maybe is gentler than No, and also we are overly optimistic about how much we can fit into our lives!
Maybe is not a kind way of saying No. It actually has the opposite effect. It creates hope, when there is none. It requires extra expenses at times, when it is unnecessary. It creates disappointment when you don’t show up.
So my new approach and my advice that I am sharing with you all (you’re welcome) is if your Maybe is likely a No just say No and be done with it. You can always ask down the line later if you can attend if your circumstances change. But responding with Maybe just leaves all parties hanging.
If your Maybe is truly and honestly a Maybe, if that is even possible, then explain the situation to the host. I don’t mean explain it in order to justify your soft No. I mean actually let them know what is going on and give them the option of not including you if waiting for your circumstances to surface is going to be problematic!!
So there you have it folks, Yes might be the best, but No definitely comes in ahead of Maybe!
Are you a Maybe kind of person? Struggle with decisions? Or are you quick to respond and sort things out?
PS Thank you Hilary for today’s post inspiration 🙂